Good ‘ole music. How I love thee. Well let’s go one step further, I couldn’t imagine my existence without some kind of music. It’s my passion beyond all else. It has been my friend, my companion, my jealous lover, my sworn enemy, and the emo kid that wants me to cut myself along side of them.

Let me explain. My earliest memories in life are of music. Songs coming across the radio while my mum was trying to get me to go to sleep. It is such an integral part of my existence & my life would be empty without it.

I’m one of these people that has a song attached to every moment in that happens in my life, whether it be good or bad. It can lift my mood into ecstasy, or make me feel so dark I’m almost suicidal. It’s has such a pure emotional affect on me, and I’d be saddened with out it.

For example:

Every time I hear this I can’t wipe the grin off my face. It reminds me of all the great holidays I’ve been on all at once, and also a dance party I went to several years ago. I’m there back in the moment, it’s a reliving experience that is so real in my mind that I can remember what I was thinking, feeling, smelling and experiencing. I get such a wave of emotion that’s hard to explain.

Where this can knock me right through the floor. Make me feel terrible. It reminds me of the first person I feel in love with. Who ended up dying. It does the complete opposite. Can make my mood so dark and brooding, and make me cry like a baby.

So why am I writing about this now.

I’ve found I can pick my mood up almost instantly by picking the right music. I can lift myself to the heavens, remind myself of good friends, of the special people that move in and out of my life. All through music. I don’t need alcohol, i don’t need other enhancements, I can lift my mood higher, and for longer than any artificial stimulate ever could.

It’s been a big part of my revival this year. I’ve removed people from my life that suck my life energy out, that don’t have anything positive to add. I get lonely, but I’m more productive than I’ve ever been. I am totally focused on what I need to do, and what I’m setting out to achieve, and it’s doing wonders for my confidence, and self esteem. I value the friendships I have, and those that have gone. They all played their part on getting to where I am today.

So come along, and create some new tunes for me to remember life by! Life is music, music is life. I can’t tell the difference anymore, and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

I’ve just completed 4 weeks of personal training. The differences are pretty damn amazing. I think the biggest thing for me, is the food that I’m eating.

The cravings are gone, I’m never hungry, and it’s a way I could eat permanently. I’ve removed just about all processed food from my diet. I’ve stopped eating bread, and grains/pasta/rice I’ve severely limited. I get most of my carbs from vegetables and fruit. There are a lot of other changes, but I won’t go into them all here. As a consequence my blood sugar has stabilised, and my doctor is actually starting to decrease my diabetes medication.

I have a lot more energy, and I’ve actually droped a couple of notches on my belt. I’m in a better mood all around, and finding that my down times are more productive. I suppose it helps I’ve put everything else on the back burner other than health and fitness right now.

So here is the cold hard numbers.

In 4 weeks:

• Lost 9.1 kg
• Lost 3.2 % body fat

I’m recovering from exercise faster, and actually look forward to exercising. Love the rush afterwards.

I’m feeling renewed today. I just spent a great weekend in the nations capital. I think it’s the perfect time to be their. All the politicians are elsewhere, and the place feels like it’s just that little bit quieter. Now to a somewhat jaded Sydney-sider, Canberra on first inspection seems well, umm how do I put this politely, shit arsed boring.

I’ve been coming here for 15 years now, and have to admit it’s not at all. It has a quirkiness of it’s own. People are relaxed (think tracksuit pants) and friendly. I sit down for a coffee, and a few minutes later some one is wanting to have a chat. I’m shocked for the first 30 seconds, and I know it’s written all over my face, but then I remember I’m not in Sydney anymore, and people do honestly want to talk to you.

I caught up with some friends I’ve known for a long time, it was relaxing, it was fun, it was rejuvenating. With my current fitness kick in full swing, I also realised how nice Canberra is to exercise in as well. Plenty of great walks by the lake, and plenty of places to explore. Artwork, sculptures, and memorials abound to attract your attention, wanting you to find out why they are there.

Yesterday I finished off with a lovely massage. My friend is a local massage therapist and she is good. So if you live in Canberra please check her out.

Canberra Holistic Massage

It was with a little bit of a heavy heart that I caught the bus back to Sydney last night, and I’m looking forward to getting back down their again soon.

About 5 weeks ago I had reached a point in my own improvement plan where I wasn’t happy. I felt stagnant, and nothing seem to be going my way. I was just plain grumpy!

I decided that I needed more drastic changes in my health and fitness. One of the biggest problems I was having was I was hungry all the damn time. I try to lose weight and the cravings for food are so intense that I was distracted from anything else.

So I decided to speak to my endo. I’m a type 2 diabetic, and it had been a little while since I’ve seen my endo. So went and saw him. Lucky for me he is also a fitness nut, so I explained what was going on, and he suggested that I was now ready to try something more drastic. He wasn’t sure of my commitment up till now, and I could see he was still skeptical.

Basically he told me. If you do as I tell you to do, you won’t be hungry, your energy levels will be better, you will loose weight, and put on some lean muscle mass. If you are willing to put the effort in, I will help you.

He now has me eating 5 times a day. Doing 3 weight sessions a week, and interval training on 2 other days.

So what has happened. Well in the last 3 weeks, I’ve lost 7kg over all, 2% body fat, 3 notches on my belt, I’m never hungry, and the uncontrollable cravings I was once getting have now stopped. I feel renewed.

Conversation on Saturday went something like this.

‘What would you like to achieve?’,'I just want to be fitter, more energy, and be able to buy the clothes i like’.

‘No I mean something real, and tangible,’Well, I’ve always wanted abs. LOL’.

‘Well there you go, something real and tangible. You can do it if you really want to. And the commitment I’ve seen over the last few weeks, I really believe you can’,'really?’.

‘Yeah. I will help you all the way if you want!’,'Why the fuck not, lets do it!’

So lets see how I go. I haven’t been this motivated in a very long time, and fuck it feels good.

Not that good quality, as I took them with my point and shoot. But it was too good to miss! Wild Cockatoos letting us hand feed them on the back deck of my parents place.

Back in January my 7th Xbox gave up the ghost, and sat there. Those rotten 3 red lights bringing my gaming to an abrupt end. I was finally out of warranty, and there was no way I was going to get a free one out of this. Tried as I may, I sent it out to be fixed. The guy I took it too, just shook his head. ‘Mate there is nothing we can do for you’. The heat sink paste was now a powder, and the area around the gpu was a nice toasty black. So it was dead and buried.

I decided against replacing it. I was going through some big changes, and didn’t want the distraction. I told myself I would get a new one, once I finished sorting out my place. Well that happened. I now have a nice shinny new slimmer Xbox. The new one looks so sexy. It’s glossy black, sitting silently, begging to be touched and played with. Ok maybe I should get a room now.

I didn’t realise how much I missed playing games. It’s awesome to have it back.

Here are the photo’s from the drive.

About 5 years ago, my car was stolen. At the time I wasn’t even that upset about it. It ended up about 1km from my place, in a duck pond in a large reserve. I thought it was quite amusing at the time. I didn’t end up replacing the car as I need the insurance money for something else, and I also live in the inner city which I could get by without one.

The only times I get to drive is someone else lets me drive their car, or I hire one.

One thing I notice is when I’m a passenger, I’m a pain the arse. I road rage. I don’t even know why. It’s not like it has anything do with me. I end up wanting to scream at people doing stupid shit. I even find I want to do it when I’m in a taxi.

Put me at the wheel of a car, and I’m happy. I have no idea why. I don’t get angry, I’m patient and considerate of other road users, and quite honestly, I have a ball when I’m behind the wheel. Fast forward to yesterday. Decided on Saturday that I wanted to get out of the city for a bit of a break. Queue David, and his car. David arrives, I have my camera in tow, and I just grab the keys.

Ended up blasting up the bells line of road, stopped at Mount Tomah Botanical Gardens, wow what a great place (photo’s and another entry soon). Then on the way to Lithgow, then back down the Great Western Highway via my favorite bakery at Wentworth Falls.

I just loved being behind the wheel, although sometimes I allegedly went faster than I should of been, but I had a great time. It was very hard wiping the smile off my face. It’s the part I miss the most. I don’t miss traffic jams, city driving or any crap like that. It’s the blasting off into some mountain pass, tipping into a twisty winding road, changing gears, and feeling the cars power, there is something very primal in the way it makes me feel.

It’s one of those pure pleasure’s in life that I have, and I really have to do more of it.

All of a sudden, out of the blue my TIVO has decided of its own that it didn’t like what I was recording. Maybe it was one too many documentaries, or boring tech shows, or maybe the formula one. I sat down on monday night to see what there was to watch.

Low and behold, there is 4 episodes of Baywatch for me to watch. LIKE WTF??! I’ve never watched baywatch in my life. I’m not sure what pattern of events that TIVO has noticed on what shows I like to do this. Up until now it has been spot on with it’s choices.

I have a feeling my TIVO has the soul of teenage boy, and was so totally frustrated with my program choices, and this is the result.